National Clothesline

I just changed drycleaners. That is not a particularly earth-shattering event, but I am a columnist for the industry’s newspaper.

I thought it might make an interesting column to discuss how that came to pass, and by the time I finish writing, I will figure out how to weave a legal anecdote into it.

My wife and I loved our former drycleaner, and he loved us. We sent a lot of work to him, and he and his wife did everything they could to make us happy. They sold the business, and in a matter of weeks, I knew the new guy was not going to work out.

All of a sudden, the collar tips of my blue shirts were turning dark. My wife asked him about it, and in the gruffest voice possible, told her that it was the glue in my shirts, all of which were bought at Nordstrom. There is, apparently, no glue in my shirt collars, so this explanation was false. When we tried to figure out what the problem was, the owner of the store made it clear that he couldn’t care less if we left. We left.

Although it would have been easy for me to sue for the damage done to my shirts, I decided just to take my business elsewhere. Actually, I have never sued anyone on my own behalf, choosing instead to resolve disputes amicably or getting even in some way. Moreover, I was sure that eventually this new owner would lose enough customers to put him out of business.

What our former drycleaner failed to do was take advantage of our concerns, which were actually non-confrontational complaints. I wonder how many people just left — without complaining — because of the poor quality of his work. Even if he did not want to deal with me, he should have taken steps to fix the problem for other customers. Maybe he did, but I did not stick around to find out.

I like the new people (recommended by industry people in the know), and so far, the work is very good. Ironically, one of the blue shirts with the damaged tips came back, perfectly ironed, with a tag saying the stain could not be removed. I am very low maintenance, and I rarely, if ever, ask for my clothes earlier than the normal time.

My experience got me to thinking about customer service and the attitude of business owners. I understand (boy, do I understand) that there are bad customers or clients who you would love to see go someplace else. They are never satisfied, and they act like you are trying to cheat them. Good customers, on the other hand, are like gold, to be cherished whenever possible. We cannot let the jerks turn us into jerks when dealing with those good customers.

OK, here is where I tie this into the legal business. While it is against the law to refuse to serve anyone on the basis of race, sex, etc., it is not against the law to fire a customer because he or she is a jerk, unreasonable, or otherwise a pain in the neck. Doing work for a customer like that, even if you make a profit, hurts employee morale and makes you more prone to treat customers like enemies. And when employee morale is low, production is low.

As I am sure I have mentioned in this column before, store owners are responsible for sexual and other forms of harassment, including inappropriate comments, received by employees from customers if they (1) know about it and (2) do nothing.

An employee who quits because he or she was the victim of harassment by a customer and the company did nothing about it can sue the company, alleging that the failure to take action was the same as firing her. That is called “constructive discharge,” and courts are expanding the definition every day.

Companies need to weed out bad customers and keep the good ones. And one way to keep the good ones is to have impeccable customer service. Many years ago, a small act by a small business owner made me a loyal customer. Instead of charging me for a piece of equipment I did not need, he insisted that I buy a part that would make the old piece of equipment work correctly. He lost $200 in revenue that day, but we ended up spending over $100,000 in computer networking with his company over the years.

In addition, this small business owner did something that endeared me to him forever. Have you ever stood outside a retail store, like Best Buy (that being my most recent experience), and have the employees inside look at you in the outside — doing nothing — until it is precisely opening time on the company clock? Ridiculous, right? There is no law preventing a business from opening a few minutes early, especially where there are customers and employees ready to do business.

Getting back to my story, I had parked my car in front of the store 15 minutes before opening time. The store was on a street, so my car was in front of the store. Within minutes, the owner tapped on my window to ask if I was waiting to go in. I said “yes,” and he insisted I come in 13 minutes before opening to get the job done. Like Jerry Maguire’s wife said, he had me at “hello.”

Fire your bad customers as well as your bad employees. In some cases, you may even be obligated to fire bad customers to avoid a discrimination lawsuit. So, treat your good customers and employees well, and get rid of your bad customers and bad employees. There is no better recipe for business and legal success.